Lather, rinse, write, repeat

I get my best ideas in the shower.

I don’t know what it is. Perhaps it’s the repetitive routine of my morning suds-session that frees up my left brain. Could be that the shower is one of the few places I can’t wear my glasses, and I’m not distracted by the world around me. Or maybe the soothing lavender smell of my new body wash leads my mind to far-off places.

Whatever it is, I wish I could bottle it and use it whenever I needed it.

Some people get their inspiration being active. One friend of mine gets magnificent ideas whenever she goes for a run. Honestly, when I’m running or walking, I’m concentrating on putting one foot in front of the other. I wish it were not so—I’d love to be brilliant whilst burning calories.

I’ve heard of writers who free their minds through cooking or baking. For me, that’s a recipe for disaster. I don’t have the skill necessary to whip up a killer guacamole and a surprising plot twist at the same time. Can you say ka-blooie?

I suppose I could try meditation. I could get into the deep breathing, the soft Enya-inspired music, and a scented candle or two…ha! Give me 60 seconds of that and I’m off to dreamland. Meditation may not be the best path to inspiration for the perpetually sleep-deprived.

So my solution is to hop in the shower. Making a slippery trail from bathroom to desk, I race to record those fleeting moments when I come up with something precious.

Jack London said, “You can’t wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club.” Make mine a loofah.

What about my fellow Restless Writers? How do you find inspiration?

Maria

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Telling time by the light of the sun

So, what ever happened to sundials? And I am not talking about those made-in-china polyresin replicas you see on the shelves at HomeSense. 

Every culture on this planet has looked toward the heavens to help organize events on Earth. As I attempt to recount and plan for the remaining summer days ahead, I am reminded that every moment of each day is more valuable than say, fine jewels. Yes, that means diamonds, ladies.

This summer, I’ve had the pleasure of watching the sun set from the extremities of the berry fields, to the corn field, to the pumpkin patch. My sundial is my front porch. I can tell time by the light of the sun. The moon. And the stars. There is something magical in the brief moments when the sun sinks below the horizon, the moments where the progression of time is purely visible amazement. The sun, on its way back in time; back to harvest—the same way I am back to bed. I digress; the looming pleasure is sleep.

Yes, I am on vacation right now. Hence, the lovely reference to sleep and the time for blogging—albeit short.

A charming quote to end this post; and particularly relevant as summer dwindles: “We all have our time machines. Some take us back, they’re called memories. Some take us forward, they’re called dreams.” (Jeremy Irons)

Hope your summer has been filled with the magic of both memory & dream.

And that you too, have had moments of telling time by the light of the sun—and not your alarm clock.

B Jas

P.S. A good summer read: “Memory and Dream” (Newford Series) by Charles de Lint.

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On rain, reading and rabbits

Nothing like a rainy Saturday to curl up with a great book. Next on my reading list is The Children’s Book by A.S. Byatt. I, unfortunately, have not had the opportunity to enjoy it yet.

Here’s how the day has gone so far:

5:00 a.m. Woken up by the sound of our newest cat, Mary Piper, knocking over her water dish. Found and used the paper towels, sighed, and made some coffee. Read the Saturday Star.

6:00 a.m. Went for a long walk. Tried a bit of jogging to counteract the evil-but-delicious hunk of cake I had during a farewell party for a work colleague. Gave up and counted rabbits instead. Still felt virtuous. Early in the morning, watching the sun rise and breathing in the scent of grass and wild chives, it felt like anything could happen.

7:00 a.m. Walked to grocery store for more milk. Remembered to bring reusable bags for once. Had breakfast (fresh apple lattice tarts).

8:00 a.m. Showered. Watched infomercials while brushing my teeth.

9:00 a.m. Worked on my current indexing project for about an hour. Avoided getting distracted by laundry.

10:00 to 11:00 a.m. Continued to work on indexing. I now know a lot about glaciers and glacial landforms. Next chapter—soil erosion.

11:00 a.m. Jeremy wants an early lunch; I am persuaded. We have hot beef sandwiches on rye with gravy, potato salad and pickles. Nap is inevitable.

12:00 noon to 1:00 p.m. Yes, I napped. For a whole hour. Sue me.

1:00 p.m. Once again woken up by feline fumblings. This time it was Two-Wee, asking nicely but incessantly for food. I served my furry master and yawned my way downstairs for more coffee.

2:00 p.m. Drove out to my sister’s place for a quick visit with her and my new niece. Visit turned into a Doogal marathon (my other niece’s favourite movie). Finally said my farewells and headed back home. Rain started. While driving down Highway 6, I thought about stopping by at Beckie’s. I debated with myself: I can’t just show up without calling. Sure you can! Anyway, her phone number is in your cell. I left my cell at home. No, it’s right there, in your purse. I’m sure she’s visiting with her family—or even sleeping in. You’ll never know unless you call. But I have to go work on my index. Oh, you have all night. Live a little. Go, have a nice visit! Okay, I will. But it was too late—I’d already reached Brant Street. (Sorry Beckie! I’ll see you next week.)

Present time: I’m back at the computer, 400 pages of geomorphology waiting for my attention, and I decide to catalogue my day. I didn’t get to my novel, but there are still hours to go before I sleep. I actually feel productive.

Maybe I’ll have time to crack that new book after all.

What have my fellow Restless Writers been up to today?

Maria

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Taking off the training wheels

The Restless Writers had their first official meeting last Wednesday night. We started with some tapas and wine, chatting easily about what we were writing and why. Before long, it was time to lay the goodies aside and get into the critique.

We each tried to stick to what is generally referred to as the “shit sandwich”—that is, frame your negative comments with some positive ones so the person getting the critique doesn’t feel like giving up, heading home and drowning her sorrows in a pint of Clorox.

One member shared her completed YA novel, which I have had the pleasure of reading before, along with the query letter she was using to send it out to agents. Another member titillated us with the first chapter of her chick-lit novel.

I chose to share a short story that I had started several years ago but recently resuscitated. My reasons for choosing this particular piece were mostly due to vanity. I wanted to show off my lyrical, whimsical side; and I thought my concept was inventive and a little kooky.

The Restless Writers gave me some valuable feedback. There were sections where the story’s timeline and setting were not clear. They wanted to hear more about what caused a certain key element in the story. And how exactly did the characters get from point A to point B?

But the most unexpected feedback I heard was: “This should totally be a novel.” The other writers were so adamant about it that I started wondering why I hadn’t thought to make it a novel from the start. I laughed it off, saying I was just lazy.

“You say it’s laziness, but it’s really fear.” This comment from a fellow Restless Writer must have struck a nerve, because I have thought of little else for the past few days.

I read in Monday’s Toronto Star that procrastination is being studied as a reaction against the fear of failure. Perhaps my genre of choice—the short story—is my own mechanism for dealing with the fear of failing at writing a novel.

What am I afraid of? In short, I’m afraid of screwing up.

With a short story, you have only so much room to go wrong. If one story doesn’t go as planned, you can just pick up and start again. Easy come, easy go—that was my attitude. The short story was my way of practicing writing before I started anything really serious.

Since I re-embarked on writing, I have told myself that I have to start small. I have to re-train writing muscles that have atrophied from lack of use. I have to practice writing in a safe, small and insignificant forum. I told myself that it was just like riding a bike. I just needed to practice. Take a couple of loops around the cul-de-sac before heading out on a real bike ride.

But you know what? I want to create something really spectacular. I want to invest myself in my writing, put the best of my creativity into a great book that resonates with readers. I want to write something that I would love to read. And although I enjoy reading short stories, when I want to lose myself in a work of fiction, the novel wins every time.

So, that whole fear of failing thing? I’m going to forge right past it. After all, no one wants to read a story that still has training wheels attached.

I offer my thanks to the Restless Writers for telling me to get my head out of my butt and write my novel already! I’m planning to share my outline in time for our next meeting.

Maria

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Near-mint cat and the CBC Literary Awards

I had the pleasure of dropping by a different drummer books in downtown Burlington last week; ostensibly to purchase the new Giles Blunt but really to play with Abigail, the bookstore’s new kitten. (RIP Manda, the sweetest little cat ever to drool on my knee.)

I mentioned to Richard Bachmann, bookseller extraordinaire and my previous boss, that I had recently joined a writing group. He shared with me some hints about the fall guest line-up and passed on a brochure about the CBC Literary Awards. The awards, sponsored by CBC Radio-Canada, the Canada Council for the Arts and EnRoute Air Canada, are for English and French-language unpublished works in three categories: short story, creative nonfiction and poetry.

The deadline? November 1, 2009. The prizes? $6,000 for first prize, and $4,000 for second prize (in each category). The competition? Surely, impossibly stiff. But who are we if not the next generation of Canadian literary superstars?

Check out more details here: www.cbc.ca/literaryawards

Maria

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Saying good-bye

Today’s Toronto Star featured an article about a woman who wrote an obituary for a failed relationship, which led to her starting an “online mausoleum” called relationshipobit.com.

This reminded me of another woman I know who has a writing group at McMaster University, who wrote a good-bye letter to her journal when she started a blog. (What a great idea, Malissa!)

This got me thinking—what do I need to say good-bye to?

Here’s my little list of things deserving a good-bye letter:

  • The book on my “to-read” shelf that I started two years ago but never finished. Yes, I’m talking about you, Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norell by Susanna Clarke. It’s been so long that I’d have to start reading you all over again, and that just makes me depressed.
  • The article or short story that I’m submitting to a journal. I want to wish each one of you good luck and godspeed. Please do better than those who went before you.
  • Those jeans from university. Let’s face it, I’ll never fit in to you again, so why should I torture myself by keeping you in my closet?
  • And that box of letters from an old boyfriend that I keep tucked away in a safe place in my closet. You meant a lot to me once, but you’re exactly the kind of rubbish I wouldn’t want anyone finding after I die.

A letter is a wonderful way for a writer to explore sincere feelings about the people, places and things that have influenced us.

What would you say good-bye to in a letter?

Maria

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Ditched!

So here I am, figuring out what I’m going to blog about for my first time (and feeling like the proverbial 40-year-old virgin of the blogosphere), when I receive an e-mail from one of our fledgling members informing us that we aren’t a good fit for her, and that she won’t be participating in our group.  The group that has yet to meet and actually discuss our, you know, writing.

It was all communicated very politely and graciously, but let’s face it – we’ve been dumped.  I think I went through Kubler-Ross’ five stages of grief in about 30 seconds:  denial (This can’t be!); anger (How dare she!); bargaining (What if we only met on early Saturday mornings, like she wanted?); depression (Writing groups suck); and finally, acceptance (We’ll be fine – at least now we can drink during our meetings.)

This whole episode has actually galvanized me to send my writing to the other group members, not to mention providing me with a topic for my first official blog entry, so for that I sincerely thank our newly departed member (do you see that?  Acceptance, my friends…just don’t let anyone else bail or I may have to settle back into anger for awhile…).

L

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How to become a famous writer before you’re dead

Well, I do believe we have Maria to thank—for her courage to blog to us Restless Writers and for giving us a safe place and a yet-to-be discovered voice. I hear an echo, Restless or Dead? Where is everyone? On the advice of Aerial Gore (How to Become a Famous Writer before You’re Dead, Three Rivers Press, 2007): GET TO BLOGGING! So, I am blogging. This is me blogging. Now what? Actually, this is me procrastinating. It is the eve of our first writing group deadline and our works are not yet floating freely to one another. Could it be that we’re all just preoccupied with ‘life’—or is it that we are frantically finishing work to make a great first impression on our peers? My dilemma is selecting what to bloody well send?! I write YA and Middle Grade fiction, Children’s Picture Books, Screenplays, and Non-Fiction (Environment/Nature). I have Query letters for about six different projects right now, all of which boast spotty (and special) characters with motivations demanding of my indulgence in their life! What’s an (almost famous) girl to do? I imagine it will be the character with the strongest pull on my gut, the one that currently tugs on my will to bring them into this world. Begging. Pleading. Pick Me! Perhaps this process is kind of like falling off a log. There is no simple, perfect, or splendid way to fall off a log—you just fall, damn-it. I came across something earlier today that might inspire some Restless Writer courage on the eve of our destruction (I mean, deadline). It goes something like this: “there is no such thing as bad writing, just bad reading.” In other words, keep putting words down no matter what. Blogging counts. What are you waiting for? Let nothing stand in the way of your inspiration, no matter how disjointed, tedious or uninspired it is. Structure and coherence are for suckers (The Roeder Report, Aug, 2008). On that note, it’s time to submit your work ladies, fall off that log, and get the hell back to writing!

P.S. If you’d like more Gore, check out http://www.arielgore.com/

B Jas

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I bet he thinks these poems are about him

I thought I’d share two poems I wrote several years ago. Both poems were published in the Queen’s Feminist Review, Vol. 3, 1995, under my maiden name. I don’t think they exist anywhere electronically.

Short Mulch

your love lies like
woodchips  sandalwood
fragrant and breathing
against my roots

Untitled

The Salamander that you drew on my hipbone
has grown attached to me.
Its brief black outline has
crept silently along the taut wires
of my abdomen, snuck into my
bellybutton and attached itself to
my womb, though what it hopes to
achieve there is anyone’s guess.
Yesterday, I felt the beast’s periphery
expanding and wrapping its way up to
my ribs, where its breathing
stays in cadence with my heart beat.
Every now and again I can hear
the salamander’s tongue hissing a
soft lullaby against my sternum,
trying to tickle my bones.
There it lies,
curled up like a tiny, red and gold
panting dog but breathing fire
instead of air.
I wonder how many other salamanders
created by your fiery hand lie
beating at breastbones and
turning blood into billows
of steam and love and anger.

These poems mark the fresh beginning and the disastrous, humiliating end to a relationship I was in at the time. It’s funny to see them published in the same volume.

Maria

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The Writer’s Shelf: New uses for old books

I just inherited the full Encyclopaedia Britannica for 2002, and, I must say, the books look quite impressive, lined up neat and tidy across one shelf. The black binding looks official, an impression strengthened by the logo, an engraved gold thistle. The spines still bear orange “For Library Use Only” stickers, which I can’t remove without damaging the covers.

The books were an unexpected gift. An Oakville woman found my name on the Indexing Society of Canada’s website. She had bought the whole set for $15 from a book sale held by the Friends of the Oakville Public Library, thinking it would be helpful as she started an indexing career. At 80, perhaps she was being a bit optimistic. Her husband’s failing health led her to cast aside her indexing ambitions and to box up all 29 volumes (not counting the index and propaedia).

I’m happy to take books if they’re offered. I do have a frugal side, and the 2002 Encyclopaedia Britannica set was probably worth a few thousand when acquired by the library. At the same time, I was gifted with two newspaper style guides, Whitaker’s Almanac 2000, and The Unofficial Guide to Hockey’s Most Unusual Records.

Over the years, I’ve accepted carton after carton of old books. Friends and family know their old sci-fi novels and beach-read doorstops will find a good home with me. Why not? I’ll read anything.

I have also accepted slightly dated non-fiction books in the past. Just yesterday, I came across a third edition of Written Communication in Business, a 1971 college textbook. I can picture this book being carted from class to class by pony-tailed young women—women destined for careers as secretaries, women well positioned to find and wed promising businessmen. There is an entire chapter on dictation, and, of course, no mention of e-mail.

While I likely won’t use this textbook to improve my writing, I can get a better picture of the mechanics and context of business communication in the ‘70s. What would a student of business need to know before sitting down to write a report? How has resume writing changed in the past 35 years? (Would you believe readers were counseled to include their height and weight in a job application?) Was the semi-colon as detested as it is today?

While some second-hand pieces of my library find their way up to the cottage—Nora Roberts and Debbie Macomber being the most likely to be banished—books like the communication textbook will probably stay right where they are. The same goes for other found dated gems, like my second edition of Fowler’s Modern English Usage; a decade-old Canadian atlas; and a book on the best home-based businesses of the ‘90s.

As a writer living in and observing the world, I know the books I purchase will fade away, lose their immediacy, become old-fashioned, quaint, archaic. Yet those same resources are the ones that remind me that all I can do is record my own brief moment in time. The instant I write one word, the world has already changed. I am a new person by the time I finish a sentence. Yet that moment of change is what gives each piece its own luminous, eternal significance.

I’m sure I’ll cherish my new/old set of encyclopaedias. The Internet can take me only so far, and I don’t completely trust the communal and changeable nature of Wikipedia. While the encyclopaedias won’t help me if I want to read up on current events, I still value their physical heft and their thoughtful essays. I am left gaping in wonder that all those volumes still only manage to capture just one brief, bright perspective of a vast and varied humanity.

So, a question for my fellow Restless Writers: what resource in your library gives you a nostalgic thrill?

Maria

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