Author Archives: Lori Dyan

When Words Fail…

I’m currently on a self-imposed, unintentional hiatus from writing. After diligently blogging, freelance writing and working on manuscripts/querying for five years, I simply…stopped. Rather than experiencing a defining moment of Today I Shall Write No More, there were a number of contributing factors.

Taking a desk job (I won’t bore you with the details aside from that fact that it sucked balls) ate up a lot of my writing time and left me exhausted. I sold my house and herniated my back within the same week. I explored my inner woo woo. My kids went from seven o’clock bedtimes to keeping Letterman hours.

Things piled up and for once I put writing at the bottom of my list. And that was okay.

Over the past few months I’ve been jotting down ideas and letting them percolate until they’re ready to be written. I’ve quit the soul-sucking-office-drone-gig day job and committed to a few freelance assignments. I have no pages to bring to the Restless Writers’ meeting, but I did write this post.

I’m dipping my toe back in the creative pool. And the water feels fine.

Vive la créativité!

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LS

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Spread the Light

Do you like to write poetry? Are you on Twitter?

Consider joining in a collaborative Twitter poem Wednesday June 20, 8 – 10 pm EST, in celebration of the solstice. The theme, naturally, is Light.

How does this copoem work? Simply get on Twitter and tweet a line or two of original poetry. Make sure to include the hashtag keyword #copoem in your tweet so it doesn’t get lost. (If you search using the hashtag key you will be able to see what others have written too.)

Afterwards, the tweets will be gathered and stitched together – perhaps with an edit or two – and the final poem will be posted at www.karenkachra.com. Who knows what we’ll come up with…it’s an experiment!

Thanks to Tara T. @tara_in_canada for this fun idea and Karen Kachra @karenkachra for organizing everything!

Happy Solstice,
The Restless Writers

ls

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25 Things Writers Should Stop Doing

Chuck Wendig wrote a fantastic post that combines my two favourite things: advice for writers and f-bombs.

Enjoy….

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Literary Agent Intern Wanted

Louise Fury is a literary agent, marketing advocate and general lover of books. She works at the L. Perkins Agency and is always on the lookout for fun pop culture books. She organizes massive book groups for MG and YA Readers where kids can meet, greet and eat with talented authors. The rest of the time she networks while navigating the slush pile.

And this is where you (might) come in.

Louise is looking for an remote intern to help her with said slush pile. Here are the requirements:

You must love to read YA and/Romance, be trustworthy (with references), eloquent enough to write a reader report and have good taste.

You don’t need to have publishing experience (you will by the time you are done), but you must love to read books and it should show in your manuscript evaluations. There will be lots of reading and feedback required.

If you would like to be considered, please e-mail her at Louise@lperkinsagency.com. Only submissions with INTERN in the subject line will be considered.

Please include the following info in your email:
Reason why you want to intern at an/our agency
5 books on your keeper shelf
The last 2 books you read
Some background information/resume.
Referral
Time available per week

A couple of us Restless Writers have had dealings with Louise and can attest that not only is she a fantastic agent, but also a very funny and smart lady.

You can find out more about Louise at http://www.louisefury.com/ or follow her on Twitter at @louisefury.

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Out of the Mouths of Agents

Tip #27: Do not show up at an agent's office wearing this.

I used to be very superstitious when it came to querying agents. It started when someone told me the best time to query was between January and June, but I took it to another level. I started trying to get into the minds of agents (i.e. Would s/he be more receptive to my email in the morning or afternoon? Should I wait until mid-week in case s/he had a crappy weekend? Etc.). It was exhausting, not to mention…unhealthy.

Thankfully, the conference I went to last autumn cured me of my Agent-related OCD. The agent/editor panels were a revelation—instead of guessing what made agents tick, I was able to sit back and listen to them tell me. On the off chance there are other A-R OCD sufferers out there, here some pearls of wisdom, straight from the agent’s mouth:

What agents are seeing too much of:
– Vampires and werewolves
– Mid-life spiritual memoirs
– Heavy YA (i.e. young girls being severely abused)
– Talking animals in children’s books

What would agents love to see:
– Judy Blume-like contemporary middle grade
– Chinese spy novel set between two World Wars
– Historical thriller that lends to a series/branding

What can an agent bring to the table:
– Editorial experience
– Other opportunities to create revenue streams (i.e. speaker services)
– Someone who will champion your work to the world

What agents look for in a new author:
– Writing is becoming very voice-driven and it must be engaging and distinct (i.e. don’t try to write like J.K. Rowling)
– Emotion on the page that evokes a visceral response in the reader
– A great title can make the difference in an agent giving attention to your query
– Have an understanding of the publishing business so you know what your work has to go through before it’s printed
– Critique partners are essential in getting your manuscript ready for an agent, who will then take it up another notch before going to publishers

What all aspiring authors should know about agents:
– Agents take on new clients in cycles, depending on their current list, and much of getting an agent depends on timing
– Summer is not a slow time to query—it’s always busy (one agent signed a client on Christmas Eve! Another one found her client at a drag show!)
– A good query has a hook (logline), book (plot) and cook (bio)—don’t get too clever/cute/wordy

What agents think of social networking:
– Interacting on Twitter and Facebook demonstrates to editors/agents that you are serious about being a career author and building a network
– Unless you get 60,000+ hits per month, having a blog is not as important for fiction writers—the story is what really matters
– Remember that the internet is like a live microphone—be nice and supportive online because agents and editors and readers will Google you
– Think of Google as your virtual resume

What agents think of self-publishing:
– It’s ideal for traditionally-published authors who already have a readership base or who’ve regained rights to previously-published work
– Do it properly (e.g. hire a professional editor, graphic designer)
– Digital publishing is growing, but it’s still one piece of the author’s puzzle
– Agents/editors act as gatekeepers for quality control and can offer brand management (i.e. media outreach) that an author can do alone, but is infinitely harder
– “Debut” is not a dirty word in publishing and often no data is better than bad data when it comes to sales tracking
– It can be tricky trying to move from self-publishing to traditional—40,000 copies sold through self-publishing may be interpreted by a traditional publisher as either not enough copies sold or that it’s been sold to everyone who will buy it
– If your genre is hard to categorize or you have plenty of time to self-promote, self-publishing may be a good option for you

What should you ask an agent when you get “the call” (or, more likely, “the email”):
– How do you work (i.e. does contact occur via phone, email, etc.)?
– What’s the plan from here? What do you see as next steps in terms of short and long-term strategy?
– What do you connect with in the book?
– What revisions do you suggest?
– What’s your experience with my kind of book?

What’s the biggest thing Lori learned from the agents?
– Agents are, remarkably, regular people. And like other regular people, there are some you click with more than others. They have good and bad days, they have personal preferences when it comes to books (and, one would assume, other things), they love their authors and they love what they do. Most importantly, they all want to find new authors with fresh voices and exciting ideas.

As you may have gathered, it appears that the best time to query your dream agent is…right now. Seriously—if your Chinese spy novel set between two World Wars and query letter are as perfect as you can make them, it’s time to send them out into the world.

If your voice is strong, pace is unputdownable, timing is right and you don’t include glitter with a lemon-scented query letter, today could be the day you get an agent.

LD

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You Think Querying is Tough???

LD

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If You Want an Agent, You Need Backspace

I learned about the Backspace Writer’s Conference the way I learn about most things: Twitter. An author I follow tweeted about his new agent and his blog detailed the experience (Backspace played a huge role).

I cannot emphasize enough what an amazing opportunity this conference provides to authors looking for an agent. Unlike most writing conferences that offer a couple of anxiety-ridden pitch sessions, Backspace provides genre-specific workshops where authors spend hours having their query letters and opening pages critiqued by agents seeking new clients.

Not all participants receive offers of representation, but at the very least they should come away inspired and informed enough to make their manuscript query-ready. I received multiple requests for my women’s fiction manuscript, but of equal importance was the opportunity to connect with writers who have become beta readers, cheerleaders and swoon-worthy drinking buddies.

I’ve also completed a children’s chapter book that I’m ready to query, but only YA was being represented in the workshops. Luckily, Backspace offered agent/editor panels on both days and writers were able to pitch their work to them following the sessions. This allowed me to connect with agents who represent children’s fiction (more referrals and requests for pages).

Since I went totally budget on the accommodations and was able to score a cheap flight, the entire conference cost me just over $1,000—obviously a significant chunk of coin, but think of it as an investment in yourself…that’s how I sold it to my husband 😀

LD

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How to Rock a Writer’s Conference Before It Starts

Exactly one week from today I’ll be in New York for Backspace, a two-day conference limited to 100 writers with only literary agents/editors in small workshops. I am equal parts excited and nauseous at the thought of doing this on my own, without a Restless Writer or Word Bitch to hold my hand.

Luckily, all of these ladies have been to conferences in the past and briefed me on what to bring and expect while I’m there. But what about all of my non-conference time? I’ll be in New York City for three days—I can’t just hide in my room!

This is why I’ve made some plans. They are neither writerly nor particularly touristy, but they give me something to look forward to besides the conference (plus, the anticipation of these distractions keep me from freaking out about the reason I’m in NY…agents!…ack!)

I land on Wednesday morning, but the conference doesn’t begin until Thursday. I’m not staying at the hotel, so I can’t easily troll the bar lobby for fellow attendees. Instead, I’ll be at an exercise class.

Before you slam your laptop closed in disgust, hear me out. This isn’t just any exercise class: it’s Physique 57, beloved by Sofia Vergara and Christy Turlington, among others. I’ve been using the DVDs for months and can’t wait to take a class in person. This will also alleviate any potential guilt when I scarf my way through Manhattan.

On Wednesday night I’m going to The Upright Citizen’s Brigade, which was founded by Amy Poehler and some friends over ten years ago. It offers sketch comedy and improv shows every night for five dollars, and no two shows are alike.

Many actors from 30 Rock (Kenneth! Lutz!), The Daily Show, The Colbert Report and Saturday Night Live got their start at UCB. It’s not uncommon for celebrities such as Tina Fey or Steve Carell to jump on stage unannounced. I’m going to a show featuring writers from Conan who will be performing new material in advance his show taping in New York the following week.

Thursday evening has been left open on my itinerary for hanging with conference peeps, but if that doesn’t pan out I heard that Hugh Jackman is previewing his one-man show that night…

New York is the city that doesn’t sleep and for three days next week, neither will I.

LD

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Doing a NYC Writing Conference on Eighty Dollars a Day

For three days in November I will be attending the Backspace Writers Conference in New York [insert squee’ing sound here]. This is my first conference and I am determined to do it as affordably as possible without sleeping at a bus terminal.

I lucked out getting a fantastically cheap flight as well as the early bird registration price for the conference. This leaves me with just under three hundred dollars for two nights in a hotel if I’m going to keep to my self-imposed budget.

Unfortunately, I have formed (thanks to Beckie and her wealth of information) a minor bed bug phobia. She linked me to a registry that lists all hotels with reported bed bugs and a quick glance confirmed that those little critters are swarming the Big Apple.

The conference organizers suggested looking at various accommodation options because their hotel was offering a “special” rate of over three hundred dollars per night. Paying so much to get gnawed on did not appeal to me, so I started searching online for alternatives.

Enter airbnb.com, where people who have space to spare connect with those who are looking for a place to stay. People can rent space on a couch in someone’s studio apartment on the Lower East Side for thirty dollars a night or spend four thousand dollars for an entire mansion in the Hamptons.

I was intrigued, yet skeptical. I liked the idea of staying in someone’s personal space because I assume it will be cleaner and less…used…than a hotel room that serves hundreds of guests a year. I didn’t like the idea of being in someone’s home in case s/he was waiting for me in a closet with a meat cleaver.

At Airbnb, hosts must post a profile of themselves and their space, as well as an availability calendar and guest reviews, but I still needed to confirm that it wasn’t a scam for potential Craigslist killers looking for fresh hunting grounds. I contacted a few of the reviewers to ask about their experiences and they assured me that they’d also felt a bit weird at first, but the operation was completely legit.

I booked a sweet little (i.e. standing with my arms outstretched I’m sure I’ll be touching either wall) studio for seventy-five dollars a night. The owner is a young girl who has another apartment in the building and she’s been a resource on everything from airport transportation (twelve dollars to take a twenty-minute train ride from Newark instead of seventy dollars for an hour-long cab ride) to great restaurants (a Cuban place around the corner).

After speaking to the owner I felt great about my booking, but my husband was still suspicious. Then he used Airbnb himself on a recent trip to Germany and apparently we’ll now be using them for all future holiday rentals. He stayed in a beautiful two-bedroom apartment for only eighty-five dollars a night and loved it. It turns out, the home-share concept is much more commonplace and popular in Europe. Until it catches on here it’ll be our little secret, okay?

LD

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Plan the Work and Work the Plan (unless you can’t, in which case…whatever)

This past summer was one of the best for me and my family, full of relaxing days at the lake and fun adventures. Aside from one great week in July, I took a holiday from working on my manuscripts. Like Trish over at Word Bitches, I looked forward to getting back to my work in September, once my kids were in school. I’m now a week into my plan and things are going…not great.

Last year my daughter was in school for two mornings a week and I worked part-time from home, yet I managed to crank out a decent number of words in those six hours. She’s now gone every morning—which frees up 20 hours a week—plus I was laid off in August. In theory I should be writing non-stop. The reality is very different. Here’s how the first week of school mornings has gone down:

Day One
I went straight from the school drop-off straight to the hairdresser, reasoning that the glare of my grey roots on my monitor was too blinding for me to focus on the screen. Bought groceries on the way home (the Serb someone scarfed all of the lunch treats).

Day Two
The Serb is self-employed and I’m his de facto secretary. He informed me that he would be going to Europe for business in two days, leaving me to book his hotel (sold out), flight (ditto) and car (“Can you get me a Mercedes for under $80 a day?”). I do this because making his trip go smoothly increases my chances of getting something other than airport Toblerone for a present.

Day Three
A friend visiting from Australia could only see me on this particular morning. There may have been maple-flavoured Timbits involved. What am I…made of stone?

Day Four/Five
Weekend. On my own with the kids. Didn’t have time to shower, let alone write.

Day Six
The morning was spent cleaning up the aftermath of having both kids home on a rainy weekend. In addition, I bought more groceries (see also: stress eating).

Day Seven
I received a call that kitchen countertops we ordered a month ago were in and that I needed to buy a new sink/faucet before installation could take place. The morning was wasted at Home Depot, where I stared at a wall of chrome for 90 minutes.

Day Eight
I confirmed with a contractor dude that counters would be installed the following day. Spent the morning emptying all kitchen cupboards, then returned the sink/faucet bought the day before in search of something less…chromey.

Day Nine
My husband will be home tonight and until then, I’m dealing with this all day:

Oh well, tomorrow is another day, right? RIGHT?!?!?

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