On the collective wonderfulness of the women of the Restless Writers

We Restless Writers have been on our collective writing adventure since spring 2009. Although our composition has changed a bit since we started out—with some writers choosing different paths and new writers joining us for this wild ride—we have always been made up of female members.

I don’t think this was intentional; it was just the way things worked out. I’m sure if we crossed paths with the right male writer—and we probably can’t describe what right means in any satisfactory way—we would welcome him into the fold. Although that would certainly change the tenor of conversation at our meetings.

For now, we are a tight-knit group of women, and we like it that way.

In honour of International Women’s Day, I’d like to highlight seven reasons why the women of the Restless Writers make for a supportive and rewarding writing group.

• It’s a safe space to talk, create and share. Sharing your writing can be scary, and opening your creative work up to critique can make you feel awfully vulnerable. For me, sharing my work with the women of the Restless Writers makes me feel bold and brave. I trust their unconditional support, no matter what outside-the-box idea I bring to the table.
• Critique is tactful, caring and insightful. We have perfected the technique of giving positive feedback, followed by constructive criticism, and wrapping up with encouragement to keep going. (It’s our version of “the shit sandwich.”) Our goal is to nurture the writing flame—not stamp out the spark.
• Our meetings are very well catered. (Plus, oh, the wine!) Food is love. Some of the Restless Writers are wonderful cooks, and they aim to have us leave each meeting with full bellies and warm hearts. (And often in the care of a designated driver.) We invariably attend meetings wearing stretchy pants, and no one minds.
• We swap clothes and books. One perk of having an all-female group is that we can, from time to time, foist unwanted clothes off on each other. I have cleared out many closets this way. I can also pass on books that have lifted my spirits, granted me insight, made me cry, or opened my eyes. We like to share.
• Craftiness is encouraged. Every year around Christmas, we gather together to toast the season and make something Martha-Stewarty. Most recently, we made yarn balls. The year before that, it was rustic sign boards. Whatever we get up to, you can be sure it involves glue, glitter and giggles.
• We get to connect with other women writers. We have a bunch of awesome women writers who follow us here (thanks for visiting, by the way!), and our larger networks are made up of women who tell stories, make art, and otherwise create wonderful things. Whether we meet up virtually or actually, and whether it happens just once or on a regular basis, we love having a squad of creative ladies to call on for encouragement.
• We don’t compete; we support. Each Restless Writer is working on a different kind of project. From fiction, memoir and personal essay, to poetry, performance and beyond, our endeavours run the gamut of creative expression. And that’s one of the best features of our group. We don’t come to meetings and share our work and offer critiques to write better than each other—we do it so we can write better, period.

The women of the Restless Writers are my friends, allies, cheerleaders and accountability partners. We lift each other up and help our voices soar. We console each other when emotions get the better of us, and we toast each other when we achieve a milestone. We encourage each other to tell the stories we were born to tell, and guide each other gently towards our goals.

On this International Women’s Day, I’d like to recognize the immeasurable awesomeness that the ladies of the Restless Writers have brought into my life. And I hope you take a moment to thank the women in your life who have done the same for you.

With love and gratitude.

Maria